Pushcart-nominated essayist in National Geographic, Guernica, Creative Nonfiction, and dozens of print and digital magazines.

As seen in/on CBS This Morning · CNBC · The Cut · Fast Company · Levo · NPR Marketplace · MarketWatch · Money · More · MSN · The Progressive · USA Today

Also a Seattle-based engineer and some other things.

I am not Melissa Meske, Melissa Mesko, Melissa Meschke, Melissa Meszaros, Melissa Mesulam, Melissa Makala, nor any of the other Melissas with uncommon M surnames who are also writers and creative entrepreneurs. (But if you are one of those Melissas, wanna start a convention in Melissa, Texas? People named Kyle shouldn't have all the fun.)

select writing

Restoring the Ship of Theseus

Is a paradox still the same after all its parts have been replaced?

Lapham’s Quarterly 2019

A philosophical investigation tracing Plutarch to Hobbes and Locke; Ai Weiwei dropping a Han Dynasty urn forever; copycat art vandalism; Maggie Nelson borrowing Roland Barthes’ Argo (which he got wrong); kintsugi pottery repair; Katamari Damacy.

🏆 Cited in Shipwreck Hauntography (Amsterdam University Press, 2021)

A Tour of the World’s Most Enchanting Libraries

Travel with me from monasteries to royal reading rooms

National Geographic 2017

A researched photo essay on 23 of my favorite libraries around the world, photographed by Massimo Listri.

Complaining About Latinx Heritage Month

Who do you complain to when it’s HR you have a problem with?

Creative Nonfiction 2021

The doublespeak in corporate diversity initiatives; on being the ethnicity of the month; having to highlight your difference but make that difference undifferentiated.

🏆 Nominated for the Pushcart Prize

Jade Sharma, Her Irreverence, Her Audacity

Remembering the author of Problems

LitHub2020

Author Jade Sharma had the audacity to die at the age of 39, in July 2019. When I found out Jade had “fucking died,” as her editor Ruth Curry put it, I compulsively went back through our texts and emails. I was plagued with a question. It wasn’t how; I was pretty sure how. It wasn’t why exactly, either. Then I picked up Problems and read it again.

“What really are we doing—what the fuck is this life, what is it for, where is it going? What really matters, and what do we do? I only trust people who are addled by this question, even when I fucking hate their answer.”

To Live and Die in Dimes Square

Trading claims of belonging in a community that doesn’t exist

Hudson Journal 2019

Having a beer on stolen land; the Lower East Side of Manhattan; “community” in scare quotes.

“You play Who’s More Lower East Side like this: He who’s lived here longest, wins. But if we’re going to talk numbers...”

Multitudes

Translating Douglas Hofstadter’s strange loops of translation

➰➰➰2019

Coding a way to switch pronouns in a text; exact translations that don’t exactly translate; natively genderless pronouns in Finnish; feeling like a bigot when I trip over ze/zir; is there room for the singular pronoun, “I,” to be made plural?

🏆 Monograph appears in The Strange Loops of Translation (Bloomsbury, 2022)

Escaping Paradise

My family’s attempt to escape the deadliest fire in California history

Guernica 2019

The 2018 Camp Fire in Northern California; escaping the town of Paradise, CA that burned to the ground; how to drive through flames and black smoke.

🏆 Acquired by McGraw Hill for the essay composition textbook Power of Process

“Hurtling into darkness, on the train home I read the news of the first reported deaths. Five found on Edgewood Lane, immolated in their cars. I know Edgewood Lane. It’s the only street that connects to my parents’ dirt road.”

Around the U.S. National Parks in 5 Books

A literary tour through our remaining wild lands

National Geographic 2018

Taking in the Everglades, Saguaro, Canyonlands, Arches, Yosemite, and Mesa Verde National Parks.

🏆 Included in Great America




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Oblivious, with Brown Hair

Fucking with oblivion

Math 2018

Creative nonfiction. Putting aside Marcuse and Habermas in pursuit of sex; Gauloises Bleues; obsession; the station at Bajcsy-Zsilinszky in Budapest.

When the lecture ended, in his frumpy sweater and ill-fitting slacks, he edged his way out of the auditorium. There was a fundamental awkwardness to his gestures, an angularity. It almost seemed like doubt—as though he weren't entirely sure whether his arms, his legs, were to be trusted.

Neither were mine. I had to force myself to wait until he had left the building. Then I let myself get up. Out on the street, my eyes were starved. I took off past the Szechenyi Bridge toward Váci Utca.

As I meandered I got progressively more disoriented; labyrinthine streets unfurled and little landmarks vanished when I turned around. I thought about my desire to lose myself in the streets and how little it carried over into the rest of my life. This crush disturbed me. I was glad the sky was turning to night—the way I felt made more sense in the dark.

Read at Math

The Financial Aid Loophole That Cost Me Thousands

I was on merit scholarships and need-based grants—then the scholarships cancelled out the grants

The Billfold 2017

The absurd ins and outs of Federal financial aid reporting that often negate merit scholarships for the poorest students.

🏆 Cited in support of a bill that passed legislation

“Every year parents and students pin their hopes on third party scholarships. But for students on need-based financial aid, that money actually works against them.”

As it turns out, the amounts in grants I was, well, granted, would indeed have been higher were it not for the scholarships. As a low-income student, I qualified for the full amount of available state and federal grants. But I received less grant money than I qualified for because of the scholarships. The way they calculate it, the scholarships lowered my need, so I qualified for less grant money. The scholarships I had worked so hard for ended up canceling out my need-based grants dollar for dollar.

So where would my scholarship money be going? Apparently to some combination of the federal government and the school itself. There would be no payout—not to me at least. Huh?

I ditched class to spend the next day in the waiting room at the financial aid office. It was like any classroom, students nodding off in antique chairs, except when they woke up they were confronted with a bail-bonds-waiting-room level of anxiety.

Read at The Billfold

The Silent Refugee

It’s possible to not have a country. But is it possible to not have a language?

Mask Magazine2015

Creative nonfiction, a story from my days as a high school teacher. A student of unknown origin becomes a tabula rasa until she can speak for herself.

“I kept coming back to the possibility that this girl might live in a completely unintelligible reality. I tried to imagine an inchoate mind grasping but having nothing to hold on to.”

I handed her a pencil and asked again with my sweetest teacher voice. She limply held the center of the pencil in her fist and made no indication that she knew what I was saying. I was annoyed—how do I announce her to the class if I don’t even know her name? But a bigger thought shut me up. What if something’s really wrong—what if she can’t talk at all?

I’d heard some crazy stories since I’d started teaching. Some of the worst were from our Lost Boys, the umbrella term for the 20,000 Sudanese boys who traveled thousands of miles escaping soldiers, lions, and starvation until they chanced upon U.N. camps in Kenya and Ethiopia. The Lost Boys are said to be the most severely war-traumatized children in history, and I had a number of them in my class. Though I’d never met one, there had to be “lost girls,” too. Might she be one?

Read at Mask Magazine

#155: The Pretenders

On Chrissie Hynde and the first Pretenders album

The Rolling Stone 500 Greatest Albums of All Time2017

A tour through the classic album, and the rollicking story of how Chrissie Hynde came to be; on almost joining Devo, then The Damned, then The Clash; trying to marry Johnny Rotten and Sid Vicious for papers; turns out Chrissie is a hell of a writer.

“Hynde’s attitude arrives fully formed; in three separate tracks on this record she’s telling someone to shut up.”

R*d Sc*re

The podcast that shall not be named

➰➰➰2019

The politics of nuance in a polarized agora; self-censorship; weighing a “socially responsible” left Straussian impulse against true social responsibility; online mobs and hills one might die on.

“Even nonstandard opinions get lumped into binary categories. Everything is either good or evil, left or right, woke or bigoted”

Getting Off On Entrepreneurship Porn

And getting off of entrepreneurship porn

New Worker2014

How business journalism glorified entrepreneurs to absurdity; sex metaphor LOLs; oh elusive success!—so much easier to just stare at a glossy magazine spread and imagine I already have it.

“There is only one subjective experience, that of the big swinging dick. Everyone else is an object. Certainly no thought is given to who gets fucked.”
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The Solo Woman’s Guide to the Ultimate Southwest Road Trip

Itineraries for 5-, 8-, and 13-day solo trips

On She Goes (Wieden+Kennedy)2017

A road trip hitting my favorite spots in the Southwest, like the one-horse village of Mexican Hat on the Utah border just up from Monument Valley.

Clarice Lispector and Experiments with White Heat

Stalking inspiration with pen and paper

Gulf Coast 2018

Água Viva by Clarice Lispector; flash floods of euphoria turn to waterlogged prose; paper is a feeble catchment device.

🏆 Gulf Coast’s guest blogger, Winter 2018

“We each had a mystifying liminal experience, each created our own lexicon. Yet, for the infinitude of possibility, the work we produced is disturbingly similar.”

The Pastor and Marguerite

Finding faith, losing it and—well, losing it

Hobart2019

Creative nonfiction, Southern California noir. In the shadow of a mercurial friend; Sassy magazine, Jared Leto, sneaking out; hardcore and pop punk; questionably Christian virginity.

“In her steel toe boots, she stomped and lunged into the guys, trying to start a mosh pit. Every time Marguerite jumped, I darted in the space she opened up.”

Bright Houses

Casas Brillantes

Carve 2018

Creative nonfiction, Southern California noir. The vague unease of suburban tract housing; hanging out with white people in Mexico; lacking history vs. feeling ahistorical.

The Queer Business of Naming and Being Named

On Words Without Borders

New South2018

An examination of three works that stretch the bounds of language to capture vastly different notions of personhood and identity.

“The war has left its mark on the soldiers, and the narrator’s own name—changing from Jibran to Miran, or Uftan, then to Zabdan, Shahman, Kashamshan—may itself be read as an effect, not just of the broader war, but of his private one.”

That’s a Good Idea

Precarity and the profit motive

Institute of Network Cultures2017

Frederick Taylor’s scientific management techniques from the early 20th c.; now that everyone’s their own boss, it’s just us exploiting ourselves; a drinking game for the entrepreneur-proletariat.

🏆 Included in The Pervasive Labor Union (2017) by Silvio Lorusso

What it Means to Compete as an Artist

Seeing clearly when your business is personal

Big Cartel2017

The special hell of being a personal brand and doing battle with other people’s personal brands; how to focus on your own shit, avoid the drama, and maybe even win.

🏆 Commissioned for Big Cartel’s artists in business series

Show More Writing

Quantifying Serendipity

Toward a methodology

New Worker2016

Serendipity is by nature accidental, but that hasn’t stopped business from trying to capture it. I throw in my own account of how optimizing for seredipity led me to more than chance delights, but a full-fledged career.

“Serendipity's role will become increasingly obvious to the business world in time, at which point we can expect ham-fisted corporate efforts to institutionalize it. In the meantime, those ahead of the curve are starting to create environments that subtly court it.”

No Turning Back

Protesting at the second inauguration of George W. Bush

Mask Magazine2016

The intimacy of staring your political adversaries in the face; collective memory is the mob of the mind; the logic of the arena; how battle lines get drawn.

“Here the battle lines of partisanship have already been drawn. Even if she and I have the emotional depth to make a nuanced assessment of each other, it will not happen here. The environment is too charged, the hostilities too high.”

Chola Makeup

An object lesson in the art of becoming

The Hairpin2017

How to segregate by race when you’re mixed race; punks, cholas, and other options in the all-you-can-eat teenage rebellion buffet; hood-era Gwen Stefani; girl gangs; when a girl takes off her hoop earrings, you know it’s on.

“If I wanted to be fierce and intimidating, wouldn’t a bare-faced female who doesn’t give a shit about makeup or identity be the fiercest of all?”

Twenty Years of June Twenty-Firsts

In which Essay Daily asked, “What Happened on June 21st” and I provided 20 years of personal answers

Essay Daily2018

Geoff Dyer, after reading through one of his old journals, wrote, “How funny to end up being one’s own biographer, to have to resort to the kind of research required by writing someone else’s life.” Easy for me because I’ve kept a record of every day of my life for over twenty years! Take that!

🏆 Anthologized in What Happened on June 21st (New Michigan Press, 2018)

🏆 Guest on the Essay Daily Podcast

On this day in 1998, A fragment of a quote from Kafka—something about how he’d rather have a page of good writing than a day of beauty. I remember thinking: man, I love you, but you are as wrong as the day is long—and it’s the solstice...

On this day in 2003, I studied Hungarian while my roommate was out, went to a meeting about the housing co-op we were starting, and then packed up to go to Sacramento for a direct action and a march. I remember hiding my language studies because it felt immoral, shameful, to spend time learning esoteric things while a war was on. I consoled myself knowing that one day, after I made myself effective in fighting the system, I’d have plenty of time in prison to fritter away studying agglutinative languages...

On this day in 2009, I was living in my car again, somewhere in New Mexico...

There is one reason to document your days: to honor your life. It’s a bottle thrown to sea. Should it come back, it will sound familiar but distant, like an echo or a shell pressed to the ear.

Read the anthology from Essay Daily

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select experimental and memoir


Mood Lighting

Fanzine 2018

𓄿

Code Lit 2024

Sapir and Whorf

Unlost Journal 2017

The Case for Negligence

Vagabond City 2019

The Flaw

RIC Journal 2019

In All Caps

Longridge Review 2015

Dead in the Eye

Flapperhouse 2018

My Own Private El Paso

L’Éphémère Review 2018

Zapatistas of Berkeley

The Collapsar 2016



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(many) other things

Software engineer leading teams at a major publishing company.

Published hundreds of writers as the editor of New Worker and ➰➰➰ and others.

Former public high school teacher with certification from Cambridge and the state of Texas.

Lived/worked in 5 countries and 7 U.S. states, traveled extensively in 35 countries.

Self-taught creative developer. I no longer do client work but here are 50 websites and apps I built long ago for a range of artists and major brands.

UC Berkeley magna cum laude, degree in rhetoric and in natural resource conservation.

Co-founded 2 nonprofits, 2 companies, many publications, a housing cooperative, and some other stuff. I keep finding things I wish existed and then try to make them exist.

Career mentor for people who don’t believe in careers.

Currently at work on a novel for people who don’t believe in novels.




alright already

If you ended up here because of something I wrote, welcome. My writing is a shameless elaborate ploy to make friends with interesting strangers.

If you’re considering reaching out, just do it. I talk to all kinds of people for all kinds of reasons and I love it. I offer formal career mentorship and for everything else you can just book time with me.

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If you’re not already familiar with me, here’s the most interesting podcast conversation I’ve had (on Vandal’s Curious World podcast), the most inspiring book I’ve been in (Courtney Martin’s The New Better Off: Reinventing The American Dream), and my most bad-ass print magazine interview (Michelle Obama’s feature about first-generation college graduates, in More).

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email: email[at]melissamesku.com

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